BDSM Weblog

I’d like to think that I am a very tolerant guy. My opinion is, “If it floats your boat, and isn’t hurting someone else, then great!” Doesn’t mean I’m into everything, of course. For example, fecal play is on my list of “squicks.”  But if you’re into things like 2 girls 1 cup, then great!  There are other people out there who are into it too — and if not, just put it on the Internet, and then there will be other people into it even if there weren’t before.  The Internet is amazing like that.  How else would we get shitting dick-nipples?  I would advise any sane person against clicking that link, by the way.

But what confounds me is when someone into one thing makes a judgment call on someone into another thing.  “I love it when my partner dresses up like a little girl and sits on daddy’s cock.  What?  You’re into play rape scenes?  That’s disgusting!”  And the wording is important here.  It’s one thing to say, “That disgusts me.”  It’s another to say, “That is disgusting.”  The latter implies a judgment call on the activity itself.  I again go back to part of the definition of squick in the ever-useful Urban Dictionary:

Stating that something is “disgusting” implies a judgement that it is bad or wrong. Stating that something “squicks you” is merely an observation of your reaction to it, but does not imply a judgement that such a thing is universally wrong.

It seems that a lot of people are unable to draw the distinction though.  As if because something isn’t for them, then it must universally be wrong.  This is especially ironic in the BDSM lifestyle, where I’ve seen it more than I would have expected.

I think a similar phenomenon is when people are in a debate, and refuse (or perhaps, are unable) to see that the other person has a valid point even though it conflicts with theirs. It seems that few people are capable of saying, “I see your point, and I understand why you believe that, but I still disagree.”

Filed under: Rants, Thoughts by Sammael